Life Goes On

Well today is a day that will forever change my life. It's a day that I know no matter how much time has passed, I will be able to remember exactly where I was at, how I felt, and what rushed through my mind when my doctor called me and told me that I have Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia.

Over five weeks ago, I was laying in a hospital bed in the ER preparing to have an emergency open appendectomy.  I've mentioned before how mad I was at the mere fact that it interrupted my life. Five weeks later, I realized that having appendicitis and that surgery was one of the biggest blessings of my life. Why? Because had that not have happened to me, I probably never would have known anything more serious was wrong with me, until it could have been too late.

Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia (CML) is caused when one of the chromosomes in your body changes, or mutates. They call this changed chromosome the Philadelphia chromosome. This abnormal chromosome then creates a new gene, called BCR-ABL. This gene causes certain blood cells to grow out of control, and causes the diseased white blood cells to not to grow or die like normal cells.  

There are three stage of CML: Chronic, Accelerated, and Blast. The first being the best, the last being the worst. I am in the chronic phase. Most of the time when people find out they have this disease, it's in the chronic phase, and it discovered accidentally by abnormal blood work, such as in my case.  I do have the common symptoms associated with CML but had I not have known my blood was jacked, I would have just brushed them off as me still recovering from my surgery or just overdoing it like usual. Here lately, I've been very tired, have lost weight, have had a change in appetite, have more frequent headaches, some numbness, and occasionally get disoriented and lightheaded. I just don't feel good. I didn't realize how bad I've been feeling until last week. Last Wednesday I woke up feeling good. I had energy. I was motivated. I was in such a great mood, and it was then I realized, "Wow, this feels great." But it was short lived. I'm not saying everyday is a bad day, but I just don't feel like me.

 There is no cure for CML. However, when it's in the chronic stage, the standard treatment is medication, that is because it's generally effective. So effective, the survival rate is 95%. The medication I will be taking is called Gleevec. I will take this pill every day for the rest of my life. The rest of my life. And not just that pill, but also a  medication to protect my kidneys. (Gleevec is hard on them.)  Doesn't sound so bad? Well, there is the chance the medication won't work. If that happens, we will try other medication until we have to resort to a bone marrow transplant. And there is the chance that it could progress into a more serious phase. And since this is a medication that targets and kills my 'bad' blood cells, there's a chance it could kill too many blood cells and I will have to have a blood transfusion. What is more likely is the side effects I will have with this medication. And since I will be on this for the rest of my life, I'm not really looking forward to that. So treatment begins as soon as my medication comes in the mail. Why in the mail? Because when you are dealing with a drug that treats cancer, you can't just pick it up at the local Walgreens.

So that's where I am. And you know what? I am relieved. Now that we finally know what's wrong with me, we have created a plan, and can move forward. These next few months are going to be rough. I'm anxious to see how this medication will react to my body. I have lots more doctors appointments, tests, and yes, more bone marrow tests in my future, and can only imagine how much my insurance company and bank account is going to hate me, but I'm okay with it, because  I can't wait to get back to me again. Even though this is going to affect my life for the rest of my life, I'm not mad, sad, or upset.  Far worse things happen to people. I am just so thankful we have caught it so soon, and I'm even more thankful this is happening to me, and not to Talon or any of my nieces or nephews at that. With the help of  God, my family, friends, and good looking doctor, I will get through this.

And life will go on.